I am answering your questions

I receive a lot of emails from people who have various questions to ask me.

The emails have been piling up and I finally decided to work my way through a few of them.

Here are your answers.

Your album The Fame came out last year, but, inarguably, 2009 has been the year of Gaga.

How are you feeling about that?

-What on earth are you on about?!

I am sorry, I don't understand the question.

If you were a Star Trek character, which one would you be?

-Don't insult me.

Do you speak Norwegian?

-I can speak as if I had a coaster shoved down my throat, yes.

What was it like to live in Moscow?

-I have never even been there, but I did write a children's book in Swahili once.

If you were a salad, what dressing would you have?

-Personality

For how long have you had your cat?

-If you are referring to the rug I wipe my shoes on, I have had it for about 3 years.

It is no longer alive, may I add.

You often burp loudly, have you got a gastric problem?

- It is fashionable.

I will not discuss this further with you. You seem to be constipated in your brain.